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Monday, February 22, 2010

Changing our Story...

Warning... This might be the longest post in the history of blogs ;)  And also, y'all know that I'm not super eloquent with my words, but here it is...


We are changing our story...
And something is missing from this picture!

It all started September, 2008.  I got an email that had been forwarded many many times.  I opened the email and started watching the link before me.  I started screaming for Derek because..... I knew these people in this video!!! I did not expect that!

Here's the video....The Alexander Family and Abe

http://www.kristinjphotography.com/Slideshows/Day4_Slideshow/Ethiopia_Day4/

October 2008, I started this blog and it was fun....but it was even more fun to follow other peoples blogs and I learned in the blog world....you make some pretty neat friends....and then I became "blog friends" with this sweet girl...and I got to follow and watch this story from a pretty early point.... and this is how it turned out....The Johnson Family and Lucy Lane

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=duyL9UjLrdM&feature=player_embedded

All the while..... I thought this is the COOLEST thing for others to do..... but not us...... we could never do that.... that's just not "us".... we are not "good enough" to do that.  What we learned through some of this process is that God doesn't call the equipped, He equips the called. (Thank you Kim for that line)

Well, God had other plans.  Boy did He ever!
He worked on my heart.  But I wasn't about to say anything to Derek.  Our kids followed these stories of others that adopted too.  They begged and begged for us to "adopt a baby from Ethiopia".  We tried our best to hush them with.... lots of excuses.  But God used them to work on our hearts.  All the while God just nudging us in so many ways and He just kept stirring our hearts.  The stirring would just not stop.

In November 2009, we went to Cancun with a group of 7 couples and we had lunch with a couple that we have been friends with for years (In fact, she introduced Derek and I).  I will just say that the lunch conversation was life changing.  And it was at that point that Derek's heart was changed.  Thank you Chad for allowing our Lord to talk through you...

So our hearts were opened and changed.  And we talked about the subject A LOT.... everyday...lots and lots....and then Derek put it perfectly one day.... He said, "HOW CAN WE NOT?" ...... well that was powerful.


...Once our eyes are opened, we can't pretend we don't know what to do. God who weighs our hearts and keeps our souls, knows that we know, and holds us responsible to act
   - Proverbs 24:12

It is a total God thing.  We firmly believe He called us to do this.  Then Derek said, "let's pray about it for 30 days straight"....over and over again....God said YES YES YES!.... THIS IS WHAT I WANT YOU TO DO! (at least we think that is what He said!)

Then one day... I came across this.... a blog post from a very wise beyond her years full of the Holy Spirit girl... who is in Uganda and just living for the Lord.
It is dark. It is quiet. The cold rain drips through her thatched roof soaking through the thin sheet she wraps around her skeletally frail body. Grace is 80 years old, blind, and all alone. Her HIV has progressed into full blown AIDS making it impossible for her tiny body to fight off any type of infection. The merciless cough caused by tuberculosis racks her body. In despair she cries out to God, a God she has not spoken to in twenty years, believing he had forsaken her when the AIDS virus took her precious husband and all 6 of her children from this earth. She wails to Him and asks if He can hear her. She knows that her life is near the end. She desperately wants to believe in something, anything, before she departs from this world. She begs the Lord that if He can hear her, if He is indeed real, He would send her a friend, a visitor, some kind of sign that someone out there cares. She falls asleep shivering, with a plastic trash bag over her head to keep the rain off her face.
The next day I make the familiar trek through the Masese III village, Patricia strapped to my back, bandaging wounds, testing for malaria, kissing foreheads. A woman from our beading group (go buy a beautifully handmade necklace and feed a child!www.147millionorphans.com) suggests that I go visit a blind old woman that she has heard of who may need some assistance, so I grab my dear friend Tamara and head deep into the village in the direction we have been pointed. I am not prepared for the sight that meets my eyes. Grace is indeed old and blind, but that only scratches the surface of her troubles. I actually spend a few minutes marveling at the fact that she is still alive. Her body is hardly strong enough to sit up, let alone stand or walk. She has not eaten in three days, and she hasn’t seen in 5 years. What gets to me most is the eerie quietness that surrounds her house, in the very back of the village near a trash pile, all the neighbors gone to work, even the wind seems quiet today. I think for a moment that her tiny mud house is exceptionally dark inside, and then I remember that for her, it is already dark anyway. I embrace this sweet woman, patting her back and kissing her cheeks and I tell her that Jesus loves her and I love her. “He does!” She exclaims. “He has sent me visitors as I asked!” Her excitement turns to a whisper, “I had stopped believing. I did not think God cared for me. Lord, I believe in You.” Tears streamed down both of our faces and together we began to pray to our Father who sees and hears and answers even the smallest of our requests.




All this took place about three months ago and was just the beginning of lots and lots of time spent with Grace. I would take her food a few times a week that her neighbors would help her cook every day. We went to many, many doctor’s appointments getting her treatment for her TB, blood transfusions, and lots of vitamins. When I brought the girls to meet her, they instantly fell in love with her sweet heart and immediately adopted her as their Jja Jja (grandmother). Most Sundays the girls and I pack up a picnic lunch and head over to Jja Jja Grace’s house to share a meal with her, read the Bible, sing and dance. The girls love it and Grace loves the house filled with noise and laughter. On Christmas day we ate lunch at her house and God gave all of us the most beautiful Christmas gift (second only to His Son, of course!) Jja Jja Grace, who just months ago had been too weak to stand, began to walk. She walked around the outside of her entire house (about ten square feet), praising the Lord the whole time. As neighbors came to watch and ask, we prayed with them to accept Jesus. Grace’s testimony was changing lives right before our eyes, and how blessed we felt to be a part of it.
Two days ago I went to visit Grace and was surprised to see that the food we had sent her for the week remained uncooked and uneaten. She said the neighbor who had been helping her cook the food had moved away three days ago, and she had not eaten since. I asked her how she had been taking her medicine, and she said that she feels around for each of her five packets of medicine and swallows one pill out of each. This presents a problem as they are all different, some to be taken 3 times a day, some to be taken two at a time, some with food, and some without. This clearly was not going to work. After talking to more of Grace’s neighbors and finding no one that was willing or even able to help, it struck me. We were going to have to move Jja Jja Grace in with us. To say that the idea of this overwhelmed me would be an extreme understatement. The girls helped me cook Grace’s lunch and wash some clothes for her, and we headed home so that I could think and pray about what to do next.
I rolled around in my bed not sleeping that night, “God are you truly asking me to do this?” And God said, “I think you know the answer. You don’t actually wonder if I am truly asking you to do this, you are just afraid of the inconvenience it may be to you to have a blind old woman in your care.” It was true. Somehow, adopting a grandmother seemed a lot more daunting than adopting a child. But it boiled down to this: Do I believe that Jesus was serious? Do I believe what He said was true? And the answer is yes. I believe that he was serious when He said to love my neighbor as myself, and I believe He meant this even when my neighbor was not tiny and cute and cuddly. I believe when He said to love my neighbor as MYSELF. He really meant to care for others as I would care for myself or my family, and I would never let myself or my family live in such conditions. How different it can be to “believe” the word of God and to take it literally.
As I thought of all the different life changes that would need to take place for us to accommodate Jja Jja Grace completely overwhelmed me, but the only reasons I could think of to NOT move her in with us were completely selfish. We have enough room, we have enough food, we have enough love. We have enough. I kept coming back to Matthew 25, a passage etched in my hear that says:
"When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit on his throne in heavenly glory. All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. He will put the sheep on his right and the goats on his left.
Then the King will say to those on his right, 'Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.'
Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?'
The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.'
Then he will say to those on his left, 'Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.'
They also will answer, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?' He will reply, ‘I tell you the truth, whatever you did not do for the least of these brother’s of mine, you did not do for me.’
Then they will go away to eternal punishment, but the righteous to eternal life.”
I BELIEVE that when Jesus said, “I tell you the TRUTH,” He meant just that, that His words were true and He wasn’t kidding. YES, I believe that I am saved by faith through GRACE. Grace that is freely given and cannot be earned by anything I do. But I also believe that sometimes we rely so heavily on the Grace of God to cover our sins that we blatantly disobey His word and feel ok about it. “Depart from me you who are cursed into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels.” THAT is what Jesus will say to those of us who do not care for the least of these. I believe this is true because I believe His word is true, EVERY word is true, plain and simple. That is a heavy, heartbreaking thought. How often have we neglected you, Lord?
“I’m sick,” He said, “will you look after me? Will you invite me in?”
Yes.
In the morning I sat the girls down for a family meeting, something that is quite routine at our house. I already knew what their response would be when I asked them what they thought about Jja Jja Grace coming to live with us; I knew that they would be more than willing, excited even. They are SO MUCH better than me at giving without holding anything back. The vote was unanimous, they jumped up and down and squealed and told me thank you for having such a good idea. I laughed to myself; this was SO not my idea.
We went back to Masese that day and after women’s meeting went down to Jja Jja Grace’s house to invite her to move into our home. Tears welled in her eyes and a grin crossed her face, “God has given me a family,” she cried. “All these years with no one, and He has given me a new family!” What happened next threw me for a loop though; she said no! I looked up and wondered. All that thinking and processing and not sleeping, and she said no. She said that she was too old to start a new life and would be too much of a burden on us. She said that Jesus would be the one to take care of her and we could just continue to do what we can at her house. The girls begged and pleaded, but she had made up her mind. I will not pretend that my selfish, human heart didn’t feel some relief.
As we left, all feeling encouraged by the love God has sewn into our relationships with Grace, I wondered if He just wanted to grow me. If He just wanted to see if I would say yes. If in some small way, I was like Abraham and He just wanted to make sure I was willing to sacrifice it all for Him, only to tell me that I didn’t really have to. Jja Jja Grace may still move in; she may not. I am leaving that one in God’s hands. I believe however that the act of Grace moving into our home was not really the point; God just wanted to work in my heart. I am so thankful that He loves me enough to teach and mold me on such a personal level. I am thankful for Jja Jja Grace and all she has taught me and my family about Jesus. I am thankful for the opportunity to look into the eyes of the least of these and know that Jesus is staring back at me. I am thankful for the opportunity to simply say, “Yes.”

And there was one more giant affirmation.   I texted Derek and told him to read this blog post, and he texted back and said that is everything I have been feeling for months now and she just posted it in one big blog post.  Thank you Katie!


Sooo..... that's how we are changing our story.....Our family is going to look a little different than we had originally planned.  (ha! "we" planned!)
we are in the process of adopting a BOY, AGE 2-4, FROM ETHIOPIA!

We have decided to not keep the status quo that our family is.  God has asked us to follow His call, and we are obeying.  It is very much a leap of faith and we are relying completely on our Father for so many things along this road.  It's a long road that we are very excited about! Please pray for our family... our journey.  And follow along if you'd like!

Here's just a few facts and scriptures about orphans:


There are more than 147 million orphans worldwide.  There will now be one less! :)


There is an estimated over 6 million orphans in Ethiopia alone.


I will not leave you as orphans, I will come to you
      - John 14:18



Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.
   - James 1:27


In my next blog post, I am going to try to remember some of the "God stories" along the way that brought us to where we are today.  Including the "icing on the cake" story that I begged God for!  HE IS SO GOOD!

41 comments:

HalleCaroline said...

that will be one of the MOST exiting days of my life!!!!!!!!! Most likely it will be! :)

emily said...

Crying here at Team Alexander!!! So happy for you guys and reading Halle Carolines comment makes me cry harder. It will be the best most rewarding thing for all of you guys. Eyasu will be thrilled to have a buddy join him here.

Can't wait to see how He uses your family through this journey!

starnes family said...

I had a feeling it would be big....and I even considered this option....and am so immensely proud of your special family for taking this on.

Go, Cheathams, go! I will be praying and following this incredible time in your life!

miss t said...

I am sooo excited for you all! I know this is the answer to many prayers sent up by Brooks and Halle Caroline as they have told me how badly they wanted this! This is the most amazing adventure and I can't wait to hear about all of the details! I'm so stinkin' proud of you guys!

Aimee said...

So excited for you!! I know God has wonderful plans for all SIX of you!!! And I can't wait to meet the precious little boy that God has picked out to be part of the incredible Cheatham family! So thankful for you and for your example of faith.

Wavegal11 said...

I am soooo excited for you and can't wait to meet the sixth Cheatham!!!!!! God has great plans for you and this new Cheatham!!!!!

The Jones Family said...

We will be praying for you all on your journey. What an amazing journey I'm sure it will be too. I feel very blessed to be able share in it through the blog world!

Truly amazing!

The Soladay Family said...

Chills.all.over.my.body.

God is truly blessing a little boy with your family...awesome!

Kristi J said...

oh, you made me cry!!! ohhhh, i'm just beyond excited and happy for you all....I will be following your journey every step of the way!!! Praising God for those that LISTEN!! I promise that God blesses the "risk takers"!! Sooo happy!! Ok, so who are you signing with?? kristi

Carrie Darney said...

WOW...WONDERFUL! I remember meeting you for the first time at Mi Cocina and I was telling you that I thought that is what the donuts meant when you started the water well stuff! I also remember you having a look on your face that said, "not completely out of the question!"

What a special and LOVED little boy he will be to join your family. Your kids are such great examples and will teach him how to treat people and be so loving!

I am THRILLED for you guys!!

Kim said...

AAAAHHHHH!!!! Can you hear me shouting from Hong Kong? Seriously. Tears of joy are streaming and I am giggling with joy simultaneously. I am SO excited for you and your family and cannot wait to watch the "new" story unfold!
Love & Blessings from Hong Kong,
Kim

Brea said...

Hi Heather -- I can guarantee that you don't remember me, but I remember you from way back when. I am a friend of Amber's from when we were much younger (we took dance together). I came across your blog from hers, and I just had to comment on this post. I got chills in my body and tears in my eyes as I read your words. This is such an incredible journey that God has called your family on and I can't wait to follow along. Thank you for allowing us to share in this amazing time with you...I can't wait to see the little boy that the Lord brings to your family!

Anonymous said...

Wow! Through my tears of JOY for you, I am loving your obedience to the Lord!! I can't wait to see your new family portrait....beautiful with 6!! We do just have to step out in faith when He calls and He WILL equip us when we do. Just thrilled for your family :)
Can I please be at the airport when you bring him home??!! Lucy's video is just heart warming....God has great plans in store...can't wait to see them unfold!
Love you girl!!

michelle matthews said...

Wow! This is making me teary eyed and it gave me chills. It's just awesome! I am so happy for y'all! Makes me want to do this too! :)

Mika said...

WOW! You practically live next door and I did not see that coming! BUT...I truely believe that it God puts special people on this earth to adopt and I am always in awe of those who do adopt. It's an amazing thing your family is doing and we are happy for you! Sean and Brett will be extremely excited to have another playmate in our evergrowing culdesac. God Bless you for doing what you do Heather!

The Rand's said...

Truly amazing! Awesome news and I will most definitely be praying for you all!

debra parker said...

I am going to subscribe. First time reader. We just brought our son home from Haiti after a long and crazy ordeal.

Tanya said...

saw your family highlighted on emily's post....welcome to the journey called ADOPTION! so glad you are answering the call! i will be following along here in Utah! YEA GOD!!

Neil, Amy and The Girls said...

I found your blog on emily's blog. I am so excited for your family!! You post was wonderful and I am so thankful that your family has answered God's calling for your family. You will be so blessed!

Erica said...

Amen amen and amen. So so so excited to follow along on this journey. Welcome to the most incredible life changing experience you will ever encounter. To God be the glory.

The B Family said...

Congrats on this big change! Look forward to following your journey.

timmonstimes said...

Wow! Congratulations! I am crying happy tears. I remember you saying once how Brooks wanted to adopt a sibling. I mean, how wonderful that your children are so on board and so involved. This is fabulous. Can't wait to see who the new lil Cheatham will be! Congratulations again!

Debbi's Blog said...

No way!!!!
I am so fired up-
Count on some prayers from me!!!!!

xoxoxoxox

Anonymous said...

Hey! I'm friends of Emily's- we just brought home our sweet sweet 4 year old last year from Ethiopia too. Love, love, LOVE your story- just so amazing. God works mightily, especially when His children obey what He's telling them. It's a blessing to stand beside you, watching and praying you through this time. I'd love to keep up on your journey of faith! Congrats!

jill funkhouser said...

Congrats. I just found your blog from Emily's. You have a beautiful family. We are excited to follow your journey. Check out ours and our fundraisers at www.campfunk.blogspot.com
Blessings
Jill

Cassandra Britt said...

Hi! I found your blog through Emily's. So happy for you. We adopted a little girl from Ethiopia in December from Gladney who was in the same room as Eyasu! (don't know if they are your agency or not...) It has been an amazing experience, and I like you, had a heart for adoption long before we decided to pursue it. Cannot wait to meet your little fella-thanks for letting us follow along!
Cassandra

Jenna said...

I am Charlotte's sister-in-law. I wanted to tell you guys congrats. I hope your adoption journey is smooth :)

Julie said...

Hooray for adoption!!! Get ready for the amazing adventure of a lifetime. Can't wait to follow along. Congrats to all of you!

Stacy said...

Hi Heather...you don't know me, but I came upon your blog through other Ethiopian adoption blogs. My husband and I just recently made the decision to adopt a baby boy from Ethiopia as well between the ages of 4 mos to a year. Our journey has just begun as well and we are very excited. I completely can relate to it being a complete "God thing," for He has given us His heart as well for the fatherless. His undeniable presence and love and encouragement amazes me! I look forward to keeping up with your journey and others and hopefully being encouraged during our journey as well. Congratulations and well done for being obedient in God's calling to love and care for his children.

The Porter Family said...

Congratulations on your decision!! Welcome to the adoption journey, fasten your seat belt it is a WILD ride - but so great!!

Unknown said...

came over from solideogloria...praise God for the new direction in your life! so exciting!! We have not adopted but have an orphanage here in Mexico...we'll be praying for you!

Anonymous said...

Brought our daughter home 2 years ago from the village of Chuko in the Sidamo region. I have just returned from a mission trip to Ethiopia with the desire to adopt again. This time 3 boys ages 8 & 10. We are in the "prayerful consideration" stage right now. I will add you all to our prayers & beg you to do the same for us! You will not believe how much your life changes when you open your heart to adoption. You think its good now? Watch out! The Lord never ceases to amaze me...
Gonna add you to my blog roll!
Kristin @ www.irishopian.blogspot.com

Coco said...

I am so happy for you! This child is going to be so blessed. SO BLESSED.

Adam and I have discussed fostering. A lot.

Y'all are in my prayers and I am so excited to keep up with this new adventure.

Unknown said...

Beautiful! Praising the King of Kings for one more child to be FOUND! May he come to know more than his physical adoption and be spiritually adopted into an eternal Forever Family!!

Anonymous said...

Heather,

I am speechless at the outpouring of love you and your family are receiving for your selfless decision. I am so proud of you and Derek. And I am so excited to have a new grandchild!

Meliski said...

I just stumbled upon your blog tonight and this post sounds like me and my husband!! Except we just have one child so far, but in December we decided to take the leap and work on our own International Adoption. Thank you for sharing your thoughts/feelings as they mirror my own completely. We have not yet made the info public on our blog, but when we do, I belive it will sound a lot like this post! God bless you in this new adventure!

Stroup Family said...

Congratulations on your new journey! It is so exciting to see God's work! Welcome to the world of adoption... I can't wait to follow your journey to your son!
Prayers from the Stroups Family!

jacquelyn said...

I can't believe how grown up your babies are, its been a few years since i've see your sweet family--and a new one! Wow! Love the new news, such a blessing! Your words are full of JOY :)

NeNe said...

The only thing better than 9 grandchildren is 10 grandchildren !! We can't wait to meet #10. Just think of how much fun he will have growing up with Luke and Sam! We are excited and so proud of you all!

Karen said...

Oh. My. Precious. Word. How exciting and terrifying all at the same time! Your story is amazing and wonderful and convicting. Thanks for sharing it.

Julie said...

You will be blessed beyond your WILDEST dreams! Blessings on this journey of Faith! Julie- Mommy to 2 bio sons, and Lola Joy from Ethiopia this summer.

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